open post ;

[kirking]

you know the drill. prompts, pics, starters, tfln: do it and receive rp.

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/7 years later...

[maythrowup]

[Crimeny, if the universe depended on Jim Kirk not cracking a joke in a tense situation, no one would be calling Star Fleet Boy Friday over here a hero...

Bones' hand is already half-raised at that retort, unsure if he wants to gesture widely in a fan of fingers to an invisible audience as if to ask you see what I have to deal with?, or if he wants to put that hand up to cover his chin, his nose bridge, his forehead, or his entire damn face. The hand gets caught in limbo instead and just stays... up. As if he could catch the next quip clean out of the air. Because of course there'd be a next quip.

(It's always a tell, when he's anxious. How goddamn stressed his body gets, each muscle moving suddenly and without his direction, then holding still and stiff as a board. Tense. There's tenseness all over-- his jaw, his shoulders...)

And then there's the dress comment and it's all Bones can do not to storm out of the damn room. Or pour a third, fourth, and fifth drink and resume his inevitable descent into alcoholism.]

Nothing with you seems less dramatic.

[He managed through his teeth, a good portion of the romance in Jim's statement having been shafted by the first three sentences out of his mouth. Bones is trying, against his better judgement, not to explode. Not to get too defensive, too angry, while Jim is obviously trying his best not to downplay, not to focus on asides that make all this less vulnerable. Less real.

Both of them, for the record, are doing a shit job.

But they're trying.]

I'm not getting transferred and letting you run this damn ship into the ground, yourself inside it, with some sparkly-eyed new recruit with a perfect GPA and no experience as your CMO.

[It's the closest he can get to romance in return, with his fuse so burned out. Nearly to the quick, where the dynamite sat in wait.]

I am not getting a transfer and I am not committing treason and I am not letting you be a damn fool all alone in space with only Commander Hobgoblin looking over your shoulder, with the one eye you're leaving him.

So you'd better get a preacher and a sheet of paper for me to sign. 'Cause I guess that means we're getting married.

[And given half a second more to think about it, to let the adrenaline wear down, he might change his mind and bolt instead. He was going with the inertia, for now. When there was no better plan, you take the one that's as good as it gets.

He thought more of their relationship than that, and that could bug him later. For now, this.]

i will wait forever i told you!!

[kirking]

[It is more than that. Jim is just shitty at saying it. Or maybe just a shitty person to be in a relationship with. He's selfish and self aware enough to know it. He's basically already married to a starship and he even thought about leaving that behind too. He'll pick the crew over himself any day and he knows that drives McCoy crazy. There's never been a situation (yet) where he's had to pick between Bones and everyone else and he doesn't know what he'd do honestly. Would he let hundreds of people die if it meant that Bones was safe? It's easier to throw himself in front of danger and live up to the Kirk legacy his dad gave him the minute he was born. He loves his crew, but he thinks he might actually love Bones more.

Shitty partner that he is, Kirk blinks several times in surprise when McCoy actually agrees to his suggestion. Proposal. It was a proposal. He asked someone to marry him and they said yes. He's not drunk, drugged, dying, under attack or forced. Because really, if you think about it, they're as good as married right now anyway. They spend most nights together, except for the ones where one of them (usually Jim) pisses the other off and they retreat to lick their wounds. Jim doesn't want anyone else, despite how much he shamelessly flirts with anything that moves. He knows for a goddamn fact that Bones isn't going anywhere. He meant it when he said he couldn't and didn't want to do this without his best friend-cum-lover.

It will just be official, with rings and a certificate and an iron clad promise they are in it for good and Starfleet won't separate them. It's win-win-win-win-lose the next time Bones has a panic attack about it. Or the next time Jim almost dies.

He starts to smile after a breath, like a goddamn girl and he crowds into McCoy's space, because he knows Bones is stressed and anxious. Can read his body language like a goddamn book and he catches that hand lingering in the air to keep him from retreating, lacing their fingers together like an anchor. There'll be no hiding it or playing dumb when someone asks if they're together after it's official. It won't be a rumor or an open secret. He could slide his hands in Bones' pockets and lay a big, messy, wet kiss on him in front of everyone whenever he wanted and it would piss Bones off so much and it would be so hilarious.

That's reason enough to do it.

And all the romantic, loving, committed partners stuff too.]

Commander Hobgoblin could do it. Technically. As XO. Just a thought.

[Kirk doesn't really want to keep talking about his first officer though, especially not as he hooks his free arm around McCoy's shoulders. He's good and stuck now. Tough luck.]

Another drink, dinner or blowjob?

[The Kirk special, if you will. They've talked about their feelings and they've figured out where to go from here so he moves on from talking about it to more fun things.]